Monday was Memorial Day, and at some point, while I was on Facebook, I saw a video — obviously taken by someone indoors — showing a couple of guys outside in the rain grilling. One of the men was holding an umbrella, trying to shield the grill from the pouring rain.
In some ways I found the video humorous. In other ways I found it sad. On some level I realized I used to have a mindset similar to those guys.
The basic foundation of that mindset is the unmitigated resolve to grill out on Memorial Day. Despite the fact the day is supposed to be Along with remembering those who have died serving in the armed forces, grilling out is typically on the day’s agenda with little or no forethought.
For many, it feels wrong if the holiday — like Independence Day — passes without grilling out. I admit I often fell into the category of those who feel that way.
At any rate, this hasn’t been the case for me in recent years for many reasons. This year it was probably less the case for me than ever before.
For one thing, we have no workable grill.
More importantly, this year Memorial Day fell on May 28. That would have been my mother’s 89th birthday. She died on March 10, 2007.
I haven’t written publicly about Mom’s passing before now, and even this will be a limited mention. Despite the number of years that have passed, the thought she is gone is still difficult to bear. My sweetie, Rebecca, and I planted yellow rose bushes in her honor when we moved to our current home in Elizabethtown. They tend to bloom around her birthday. Mid-week last week a yellow rose bloomed.
It’s difficult thinking about Mom without thinking of Dad. He died just last year on May 17.
Often if I think of them, it is to the point of immense sadness. I know I should focus on the good memories and the many things to be thankful for when it comes to their passing — and I usually do — but sometimes the only way I can do that is to not allow myself to think too much about them.
So, as Memorial Day approached, I didn’t make any real plans.
What made it easier not to plan any Memorial Day activity was the fact that I had a fairly full schedule in the days leading up to the holiday. That included a trip to urgent care, putting together and hosting a literary workshop, attending the BBQ, Blues & Bikes event downtown and home karaoke.
All this made it easy to let Memorial Day go by without much fanfare. I kind of needed to spend as little time thinking about the day as possible. While I don’t wish to diminish the purpose of Memorial Day, some days are memorial days enough.